What It All Means
by CWprodigy
Summary: Based off a guide to what all the romantic gestures mean. Challenge for a friend. Please read and review.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I saw this wallpaper explaining what all the gestures and things mean so I decided to do a series for all of them. **

…

**Kiss on the forehead= I hope we're together forever. **

Her name was Casey. She had been seventeen years old with chestnut colored hair and a genuine smile. She liked art class and loathed English. Her love of cats, Japanese cartoons, and skateboarder boyfriend Tyler had made Cristina remember her. She used to play piano just like Cristina before she was diagnosed with cancer. Cristina had operated and Casey hadn't made it.

It seemed that deaths should only happen at night. If it happened at night, grieving parents would at least have the minute comfort of sleep. But when death struck mid-afternoon, parents were forced to walk around as ghosts until the day was over. It only seemed to add insult to injury in Cristina's mind.

The resident, on her part, was attempting to continue with her day. She had her earphones in contently listening to Fall Out Boy. The music was quiet enough for her to hear her pager as the gravelly voice of the lead singer tried to erase her mind. She didn't want to see the girl's cold body on that table in that OR, but she did every time she blinked.

Cristina shivered as she remembered Casey's mother as she told her. She had been hysterical: crying and clinging to Cristina's scrub top as she begged for her daughter's life. The woman looked just like Casey and amber eyes filled with such grief. It had been one of the most heartbreaking things she'd ever seen.

"It's not your fault ya know." She looked up and sighed. She hadn't seen Meredith approach.

"Then whose fault is it?" She removed her headphones and closed the chart she just completed. She would have to leave soon to get test results back. Casey wasn't her only patient. Casey. She mentally shook herself. Why was this affecting her so much?

Meredith gnawed her lower lip in thought. Her hair was tied in a messy bun and her clothes were all rumpled. She looked exhausted.

"Don't worry about it. Go sleep somewhere." Meredith looked at her friend in confusion.

"You look like Hell warmed over."

"Gee, thanks." The Asian woman shrugged unapologetically and watched as her friend turned away.

"We're still gonna talk about this," Meredith said as she walked away, hopefully to an on-call room.

"Yeah, yeah," Cristina mumbled as she glanced at her wristwatch. The lab tech told her the results would be done in an hour and only thirty minutes had elapsed.

"She's right you know." Cristina looked up, startled.

"Dammit Erica, should I get you a bell?" She didn't like being snuck up on. It was one of the reasons she hated surprise parties so much. She liked having control.

The blonde attending simply cocked an eyebrow. Truth be told, she enjoyed sneaking up on the resident and did it quite often much to the other's chagrin.

"A bell? I don't think so." Hahn answered the decidedly rhetorical question. Cristina scowled at her.

"A collar on you however…"

"Shut up," Cristina hissed and blushed despite herself. She looked around quickly. Except for the nurses that were milling around, they were alone. God, she hated when she did that. The constant toying with her at work was getting on her nerves.

"What do you want?"

"Dr. Yang, do I hear insubordination?" The look on the resident's face was almost comical. It was a cross between a deer in the headlights and an indignant kitten.

"Look if you haven't noticed my day has been utter crap," Cristina said. She was getting annoyed.

Erica's eyes softened. She looked around and very quickly leaned over and pressed a kiss to the resident's forehead.

"I know." Cristina looked up in surprise but the attending was gone.

She checked her watch with a stupid grin plastered to her face. Minus well see if the lab tests came back early…


	2. Chapter 2

…

**Holding on tight= I don't want to let go **

_Where was she? Where was she?_ She had to be here somewhere. Cristina's heart was racing, head pounding with the signs of an upcoming migraine. She blinked to fight back the rapidly forming tears. _This wasn't happening_.

"Cristina!" She cringed at the high-pitched voice of her friend as it echoed down the hall. She wanted to run but she couldn't. Running drew attention, running made you weak. But that didn't mean she had to slow her pace.

She walked quicker than before, taking random turns and slipping into stairwells before Meredith could keep up. She turned to see if Meredith was still following her. She wasn't. And she hadn't run into Alex or Izzie or George.

She ran directly into a solid form and nearly fell. But she righted herself just in time and mumbled a hurried apology before attempting to dash off again. The person grabbed her arm in a tight grip.

Cristina whirled around, adrenaline and rising panic transforming into anger. She was fully capable of given the person who dare stop her the verbal dressing down of their life.

"Cristina?" The voice sounded confused if not a little bit annoyed at being nearly knocked over. She looked up into two cerulean pools and froze.

"Erica." Her name sounded like a prayer said in a near whisper. But no, she needed to pull herself together. They were in a crowded hallway, with patients and nurses and surgical residents surging around like hornets in a nest. She steeled herself and forced the tears aside.

"Dr. Hahn," Cristina said and nodded not looking at her. "Excuse me."

Once again the hand caught her by the sleeve. She was pulled rougher than before until she was right in front of the attending.

"Not here," Cristina hissed. Erica nodded and released her arm, shooting daggers at a few nosy interns who blatantly stared at the two.

Cristina took off down the hall and barged into an on-call room. She collapsed on the bed and sighed. Her hands were trembling. She was a doctor. She knew the shaking was due to the adrenaline. But she couldn't stop looking at her hands, somehow fascinated by the tremors. It reminded her of Burke.

That's how Erica found her. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Cristina answered. Her voice was shaking and her damn hands wouldn't stop trembling. She hated not having control over her own body. Erica sat beside her on the bed, the small cot dipped under the added weight. She wrapped her arms around Cristina's shoulders.

"It's okay," The blonde cooed. Most would be surprised that her voice was capable of being that soft. But it was, if only for her. She almost felt like she was lying since she had no clue what was going on. But that didn't matter.

Cristina clung to her, nuzzling and hiding her face in Erica's neck. The attending felt moisture dampening her throat and rocked her lover back and forth.

"It's alright," Erica whispered, still rocking. "It's alright."


	3. Chapter 3

**Kiss on the lips= I love you **

Her ebony hair was messy from running her fingers through it, but not in a bad way. If anything her disheveled appearance reminds you of nights filled with deep discussions and black coffee. It reminds you of takeout numbers known by heart or the worn coffee table on which her feet are propped up on but shouldn't be. She shouldn't be in your apartment, on your couch seated so comfortably. But she is and she doesn't seem to have a problem with it.

She's beautiful really with mocha colored eyes and an impish, often insecure grin. You think back to the countless times you'll both have your eyes glued to the TV screen when suddenly she'll pause the television and turn to you with a triumphant revelation written on her face. Something usually medically related. And you would smile encouragingly and she would ramble on until she was out of breath. Then she would collapse against your chest, her warm breath tickling your neck like an infant's soft snores.

Despite your constant battles over the remote, you both like Law and Order: SVU because you enjoy figuring out who did it before the detectives do. It makes you feel invincible, like a god. Maybe that's why you became a doctor, for the God-like feel.

But now there isn't any rambling or takeout. She's reading intently occasionally stopping to highlight whatever passage she finds interesting in bright blue highlighter. She's not ignoring you. She has a surgery tomorrow with Bailey and she's reading up on it.

You're watching a re-run of _Suits_ that she's seen so many times that she mouths the words along with the characters and somehow manages to read at the same time.

You wonder if that's how she looked in high school. You can see her so clearly with her hair in some sort of messy bun with a large textbook on her small lap. A Starbucks' cup would have been on her cluttered yet organized desk.

"What are you thinking about?" She asks you, not bothering to look up from her book.

"Oh, nothing," You reply because honestly you weren't thinking. You were musing.

"We're all thinking about something," She says and her voice is suddenly laden with a mock dreaminess. There's this look in her eyes that's almost mischievous.

She closes her medical journal book recommended by Meredith and looks at you.

"So the real question is what are you thinking about that you don't want to tell me." Her smile is curious and playful, not at all untrusting, and you can't help but love it. You mimic her smile with one of your own and she raises an eyebrow.

"You're too smart you know," You reply and you know you're not answering her question. She scrunches up her nose cutely in response to _your _response.

"Well I am a doctor," She replies and reaches for a green coffee mug still steaming with peach tea doused with sugar and honey. She takes a sip before placing it back on the cork coaster. She's wearing nothing but your blue hoodie that barely covers her knees. She's petite, not even 5 foot 5 and her skin color can only be described as porcelain.

"Technically you're only a surgical resident," You tease. She sticks her tongue out at you and for a moment she looks like a child. You want to kiss her. So you do. Her lips are warm and soft and taste of honey. She sighs when it's over and tosses the journal on the couch signaling that she's done with it. You watch _Suits_ for a while in silence.

You think about how long it took you to get to this point. The arguments and lack of trust, on both ends. You're baggage with Callie and hers with Burke's. But you were past that now.

This was now, this was infinite.


End file.
